Update from Kevin & Nads in Wales

Hi All

Well it has been a very sad three-weeks for all the Snyman’s/ De Witt’s/ Olivier’s.  Charl’s death has been a shock, a trauma, a deep grief, but it seems to have been a time of bringing family together to mourn with one another. It has been sad for me, to be in UK and not with family. But most of all it has also been a time of celebrating a kind passionate man. So, I would like to dedicate this update to Charl, he always told me how much he loved reading my updates and how much they made him laugh. He asked me to send him a signed copy of my first book!!

So, our latest... Kevin and I have made a Swedish friend in our block of flats, she invited us around for her birthday party. We arrived and shortly afterwards I thought we had stumbled into rehearsals for ‘Comedy Hour’. I laughed so much my stomach (abs) hurt by the end of the evening. There were 4 Swedes, 2 Welsh, 2 English and 2 South Africans. The host Joan* is an absolute scream, she has neurosis on top of neuroses. Someone mentioned a mouse in almost a whisper. She jumped up all flushed with her hand on her heart and said there was a mouse in her flat more than a year ago, in fact the 9^th of June 2008. Well at that I was already close to hysterics.  She continued by telling us the story (I suspected the quiet mention of the word was intentional to get the story told). She stood and gave us graphic details as to where she saw the mouse, its size, exactly what it looked like, she was struggling not to go into a panic attack just relating the event. It appears she was on the couch screaming at the landlord on the phone asking them if the flat was infested. She phoned her friend Mark* and told him to come over quick, but she could not get off the couch to let him in.  She has a real story telling nature, but it ended with a show and tell. We were told all the different type of mousetraps that are in the flat and shown an electronic one, which plugs in and sends off a frequency that they, the mice (the whole hoard) cannot cope with. Directing a nod at us, she informed us that it will keep the whole building safe. Let me tell you I could hardly keep myself together by the end of this drama.

Then Mark* hushes everyone and ceremoniously pulls out two gold envelopes from his bag and there is a hushed silence. He hands one to Joan* and one to Sue*. The envelopes are littered with silver stars. They both open them and scream for joy. What it was all about was EUROVISION. What…yip EUROVISION (Hey spell check even knew this word). We were given our first baptism into the culture of Eurovision. It is a European song contest that happens every May and each European country enters one person or group to represent them and then there is voting etc and a Winner. Now we were sitting amongst a group of Eurovision junkies and addicts. So Mark* has organised a Eurovision party and our two lucky friends had been issued with their songs for the party. So inside the golden envelope was a CD of the original artist who won for a particular year, a copy of their performance and then a back track for the song, as well as the words beautifully typed out and at the bottom a little message wishing them good luck, so our contestants were given all they needed to start practicing. They have to mimic the actions and singing of the original winner. So they found the originals on the internet and started practicing, well it was hilarious, so serious was the whole affair. The one song won in 1970 and the other 1984. Big hair, gaudy makeup, golden shoes and swinging hands for the dance routine. So Joan* was holding her play-play mike and going for it. Mark* was orchestrating the events. He was so funny, even though we were all chatting and the music was playing in the background, mid-sentence he would punch the air above his head and scream ‘key change’ and low and behold half a second later the singer would change their key in the song playing.  So on the 9 Oct we have been invited to the mock Eurovision party, we will be voting via sms and all… It is going to be a blast!!! Joan* gave us Gluten free chocolate cake and dairy free ice cream as well, to end off the most enchanting evening. It will take too long, but everyone there had a funny side and I felt like Kev and I were delighted observers!!

OK onto UK MYTH BUSTERS

1. The weather is so bad it is ‘grey rainy weather, you never see the sun and you will get depressed’. The weather is fabulous; the sky is cloudless, where we live everyday, for a period of time everyday. The summer may be short, but there have been days were I have skulked into the shade to take refuge from the heat. We have whipped out our Factor 100 sunblock on a few occasions. The days are long in summer and beautiful. The rain in mostly gentle and kind, and when it has been torrential it is exciting. In case it is not obvious from our emails, we LOVE it here, and depression is not an option. I definitely do not feel like I need to buy Vit D, I have no sun deficiencies, YET.
2. People in the UK are unfriendly. Our experience has been that people are friendly even more so if you are open to them and make an effort back. Even in London we have found people kind.
3. The culture is so different you will feel like you don’t belong. The culture is certainly different, but there are so many points of common reference. There are strange differences but we are open to understanding them and we have found this process has grown us.
4. Food in the UK is expensive. No it is not, it is pretty much the same price for most items and the pound is x12 stronger, so money goes a lot further. Sometimes the prices in SA are even higher e.g. Kev found a Lavazza coffee that he likes here for £2.49 (R30) and in Knysna it was R75.00

Words and Phrases used in the UK

1. If you like something you say it is “lush”, if you really like it it is “wicked lush”. Anything can be lush, from food, to a book, to a person to a relationship
2. When people get off the bus and thank the driver they all (100% of the people 100% of the time) say “thanks Drive” and forget the ‘r’. I have heard it 100’s of times and it still makes me smile
3. When someone or something is getting on your nerves you say “ it or they are doing my head in”. I absolutely love this phrase and use it often. We have some regular customers who “do my head in”
4. People often say “Kevin where too now”, which means ‘where is Kevin?’
5. When you want to exclaim at something someone has said you scream “NEVER” and slap what ever is next to you (be it person or thing)
6. If someone tells you a heart-warming story about someone it is punctuated with “ love him” as of it were full stops in the story (even if it is a story about a woman!!!). A variation on this theme will be to say “bless” in the same place
7. If the weather is humid you say it is “close” go figure. And the North Walians say it in a particular way, it makes me giggle every time
8. Toothpaste is pronounces with the ‘oo’ sounding like the ‘oo’ in book, it took me a while to know what they were asking me for. Or some people say “toofpaste”.

Well enough of my ‘alternative English’ lesson, it is amazing how quickly we have taken in some of these things before you know it, you are saying them

Well friends, I know I promised to tell you about the Modern Gestapo, but not really feeling like such a serious topic right now. But be sure I will tell you soon and I have said to some that I will tell you a bit about the political and social issues in the UK.

Just so glad Kevin has arrived home safely. We have both decided to not EVER do the two continent thing again. He also arrived home exremely ill, but is on the mend now and improving by the hour...

So we send all our love and thanks to all for the amazing support we have received from everyone…

Nads

  *Names have been completely changed to protect the identity of the real people involved